Even If We Didn’t End Up Together, I Still Thank God For You
You know, from the moment I saw you, I thought you were my happily ever after.
All I wanted was to give my body and my soul to you, to be completely yours and for you to be completely mine.
I thought that we were stronger than anything life could put in front of us.
I thought we could solve any problem that ever happened.
But I didn’t think that people changed.
It never crossed my mind that a man could feel something one day and a completely different thing the next.
I didn’t think that what was enough for you one day suddenly became something that you didn’t need anymore the next day.
I never thought that a love as big as ours would ever get into any sort of crisis.
That love was so deep an ocean would have been jealous of it.
It was the most intense feeling I have ever felt and I will never forget the way I loved and the way you loved me back.
I will never forget the long nights that I spent making love to you while the rest of the world was asleep.
I will never forget your lips touching every inch of my body, showing me that you could drive me crazy and make me the happiest woman in the world in just one second if you wanted to.
I will never forget how we made plans for our future kids.
I have memories of us thinking about a girl who would have curly hair like you and who would be stubborn like me.
A boy who would be brave like you and sensitive like me.
I will never forget your hand in mine while you swore that you would always love me.
That you would never need more than me.
That I would always be more than enough.
But sadly, that all changed.
It changed even if I wasn’t ready for it.
Our fairy tale ended fast and hectic, just like it began.
You are no longer here, next to me, for me to put my head on your shoulder when things don’t go right.
You are not close by for me to tell you how I hate the world when I feel nobody understands me.
You are not here for me to touch your hair and play with it while your head is in my lap.
I have nobody to make love to anymore.
I have nobody to kiss passionately anymore.
I have nobody to cry with anymore.
All that we once had is just a pile of memories now.
And even though I feel bad that we didn’t end up together, I still thank God for you.
If I had a lesson to learn, God couldn’t have given me a better teacher.
You taught me that love isn’t something that should be pushed.
You showed me that when you love someone, you need to let them go.
And if they come back to you, it means that they always belonged to you.
You never actually told me that I should listen to you but your actions made me follow you blindly.
And I don’t regret I did.
I don’t regret any of my choices, especially not you.
Maybe you will never be mine again but I am so blessed that you were a part of my life once.
I am so happy that you were the one to teach me a thing or two about life.
I am so blessed that you taught me that when we love, we should forgive as well.
With you, I learned that all my wrong choices actually had a purpose.
It was just a matter of time when I would realize that.
Maybe you were the wrong man to love me but you were definitely the one who taught me about life.
With you, I learned that people can always make plans but God just watches them and makes the final decision.
He is the one who sets the rules while we live happily, not knowing what will happen next.
And when we least expect it, we lose those we thought we would never lose.
That is how I lost you. That is how my whole world turned upside down.
But no matter what happens in the future, you will always have a special place in my heart.
Even if we decided to go on different paths, you will always have a major impact on my life.
And what is most important is that I will never regret losing you.
Because it is better to love someone and lose them than to never love at all.
That is somehow the first and yet the last lesson you taught me.
And I will always carry it in my heart, being thankful for having you in my life, even just for a while.
