I’m Begging You, Don’t Text Me Anymore

I don’t want you to text me. I don’t want to wake up in the morning with a good morning text from you.

I don’t want to get used to that beautiful feeling because it’s only a matter of time before that feeling will be gone.

I don’t want to keep checking my phone, hoping you’ve remembered me. I don’t want to be a girl who lives on her phone. I don’t want to be loved virtually.

I want the real thing. Texts don’t mean anything. They are just a bunch of words put together that anyone can come up with.

My person will put some effort into me. My person will love me without obligations or must-dos. My person isn’t you.

I don’t want you to put as little effort into showing you love me as you do in lifting a fork. I deserve more than that split second—that’s how long it takes to click send.

Darling, I want that vintage kind of love.

People say it’s important to stay in touch, to maintain that type of communication. But in that way, your love for me becomes an obligation.

You’ll call me because you know I’ll get mad if you don’t. Please don’t l

ove me in a way you think you have to. I’d rather be alone a million times over.

I don’t want you to feel the need to see how I am. I don’t want to interrupt your thoughts or whatever you’re doing by asking for a miss you text.

I don’t want to pop up in your mind like something you have to get over with.

You have to have the need to care for me on your own. You have to want to hear from me and see me. I don’t have the right to make you do that.

And after we fall apart and walk away from each other, don’t text me then either.

I don’t need your apologies. I can’t turn back time nor can I forget how you treated me. You can promise me you’re going to change but that won’t erase the past.

That won’t make me change my mind.

You see, I don’t need any more promises. I’m tired of words.

Words mean nothing. I’m tired of looking at the same expression on your face, knowing that you’re lying, knowing that everything will be the same.

Knowing we will go around in circles until one of us breaks once again.

I’m putting a stop to that. So, please don’t make any promises.

Don’t text me saying it’s the new you, that this time we can make it work. Just stop, please. I’m begging you.

Don’t text me because I’m getting better. Don’t mess with my head just when I’m about to get out of the dark place you threw me in. Don’t ruin my day!

I know that you were just a lesson I had to learn. I know God sent you to me for a reason. I really loved you at one point but you didn’t love me back.

And I’m not angry. I don’t want revenge because destiny had another plan. You were not meant for me and why should I be mad because of it?

Please, when you feel the need to text me once again, please don’t.

I’m begging you. If our time together ever meant anything, if I left any kind of trail in your heart or in your soul, you won’t click send. You won’t even type in my name.

Please leave me alone. Leave me to hurt, cry and forget. Wait for a minute, stop and think about me.

Think what is going to run through my mind when I see your name on my phone. Have mercy and please, once again, do not text me.