This Time Your Apology Simply Isn’t Enough

We’ve been down this road before. You break me, disappear from my life, make me feel like I was worth nothing.

Then you come back again with your fake words of apology, and I take you back as nothing happened.

Not this time.

You can’t apologize for the same thing over and over again. It’s pointless. That apology has no value.

If you were genuinely sorry for something, you would never repeat the same mistake again. You wouldn’t hurt me again and again.

I know you think I will forgive you. Why wouldn’t you think that—I did it so many times before? But you are wrong this time, and I’m going to prove it.

There comes a point in every woman’s life when enough is enough. When she can’t handle any more bs. A point in which she realizes that it doesn’t matter how much she loves a man, she has to love herself more.

I do love myself enough not to stay with someone who double-crossed me so many times, who promised me the stars and gave me the dust. I am not falling for your sob stories anymore. I am done with being understanding about your needs, your “busy schedules” and your painful history.

Take a look around. Each and every one of us has their cross to bear and that doesn’t give us an excuse to treat someone like crap.

So enough with your excuses, I’m sick of hearing them.

I’ll be stronger than myself this time. I will be stronger than my feelings, than my loneliness because I was so lonely in this whole drama with you.

I deserve more than this, I deserve someone who will have nothing major to apologize for.

I deserve normal relationship problems, not epic tragedies like the ones you put me through.

I deserve someone who won’t look at my heart as a stop along the way from which point he can drop by, make a mess, and leave. I deserve to be someone’s destination.

Can you get that a simple “I’m sorry” can’t erase everything you put me through?

It can’t take back all those sleepless nights I spent crying and thinking about what I did to deserve your poor treatment. There is nothing you can do to undo the damage you caused.

I know you might not agree with me. I know you always think you didn’t screw up that badly. I know you diminish your mistakes. I know you blame half of it on me. I know you want another chance.

Another chance for what I ask you?
To do the same things to me all over again? No thank you.

You lost all your chances with me. If you were genuinely sorry, we would have solved everything with your first apology a long time ago. All you needed to do was put your words into action.

But you didn’t. You just broke me again, and it was worse than the last time.

Your sorry wasn’t honest the first time, and it will never be. That’s why I accept your apology, but I don’t accept you in my life.